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Mar 23, 2026
In child custody cases, the stakes are high, as the outcome will determine where the child will live and go to school, and it can affect the child’s long-term stability. Common child custody mistakes parents make in Santa Clara County can sometimes occur when parents take actions during separation or divorce without realizing how those decisions may be viewed in court.
Hire a Child Custody Lawyer
The Law Offices of Rod Firoozye is a San Jose-based family law firm serving clients throughout Silicon Valley. Rod Firoozye focuses his practice exclusively on family law and is a Certified Family Law Specialist, recognized by the State Bar of California.
The firm represents clients in matters involving divorce, child custody disputes, property division, and other complex family law issues, including high-asset cases and post-judgment family law proceedings.
When petitioning for custody from the Santa Clara County Superior Court, it is crucial to avoid certain common mistakes, such as:
Speaking Negatively About the Other Parent in Front of the Child
One common mistake is speaking negatively about the other parent in front of the child. Parents are usually expected by the court to encourage a child’s relationship with both parents, so long as it is safe and reasonable to do so.
Making statements that belittle the other parent or trying to make the child take one parent’s side may lead to a judge concluding that the parent is attempting to pit the child against the other parent. Willingness to promote a civil and respectful relationship with the other parent is one factor courts can consider when determining custody arrangements.
Ignoring Communication or Refusing to Co-Parent
A child custody arrangement can become more difficult if parents do not communicate about their children. A court can expect parents to exchange information about school, medical appointments, and other decisions about the child’s day-to-day life.
Parents who never respond to messages or requests about parenting decisions may not be seen as having the ability to cooperate in raising the child. Parents who consistently communicate about their child’s needs may demonstrate their willingness to cooperate in co-parenting. The court will typically look for both parents’ ability to co-parent.
Making Major Decisions Without Consulting the Other Parent
Sometimes, parents create unnecessary custody disputes by enrolling a child in school, taking the child to a doctor, making other decisions about the child’s care, or taking the child on a trip without first informing the other parent of their actions. Generally, when parents share legal custody, both have the right to be involved in significant decisions affecting the child’s upbringing, such as those concerning education, medical care, extracurricular activities, and travel.
Taking action without the other parent’s knowledge or consent can create conflict, and it may cause the other parent to question whether the acting parent is complying with the custody arrangement. When parents are asking the court to change their custody arrangements, judges may consider how well the parents communicate and cooperate on major decisions about the child’s welfare.
Allowing Conflict to Escalate During Custody Exchanges
Pick-ups and drop-offs are sometimes points of high conflict. If parents argue, are confrontational, or repeatedly create conflict during transitions, this can cause distress to the child. Judges may require custody exchanges to occur without conflict or interference with the other parent’s parenting time.
A parent who is not providing conflict-free exchanges may cause judges to question the parenting plan. Being calm during exchanges and focusing on the child’s schedule can improve transitions. Showing civil and respectful behavior at custody exchanges can also demonstrate a parent’s ability to assist with creating a consistent home environment.
Santa Clara County child custody laws and California Family Code § 3020 emphasize protecting a child’s health, safety, and welfare when courts evaluate custody arrangements. Maintaining respectful exchanges may show the court that a parent is committed to minimizing conflict and supporting the child’s stability.
FAQs
How Common Are Child Custody and Family Law Cases in California?
Family law cases are some of the most common situations that California courts handle. In the Judicial Council of California’s Court Statistics Report, in California superior courts, there were 108,403 marital filings for divorce, legal separation, and annulment during Fiscal Year 2023-24. A filing means a family used the court system to resolve a legal issue involving marriage, parenting arrangements, or another family law matter.
How Many Children Live With One Parent in the United States?
Custody is an issue that involves a significant number of families nationwide. The U.S. Census Bureau reports that approximately 1 in 4 children in the United States lives with only one of their parents. Parenting schedules, decision-making authority, and many other issues that affect the process of raising a child, such as those arising after a separation or divorce, must be determined by families and the courts on a regular basis.
Can a Child Express a Custody Preference in California?
In some custody cases, the court may take into account a child’s preference about where they should live. The California courts can also assess if the child is mature enough to voice a well-considered custody preference. Although the judge ultimately decides custody based on the child’s best interests, the child’s views may be one factor for the court to consider, along with other evidence, when deciding an appropriate parenting plan and schedule.
What Happens If a Parent Violates a Custody Order?
The consequences for violating a custody order can be severe. If one parent is continually non-compliant with a court-ordered parenting schedule, the other parent may file a request asking the court to enforce the custody order. This may result in the court modifying the custody arrangement, awarding make-up parenting time, or taking other actions to make sure the order is followed.
Contact a Santa Clara County Child Custody Attorney
Parents may make matters worse during child custody cases when they are unaware of or choose to ignore how their decisions might affect the other parent. Each choice you make during a separation can shape how a judge views your ability to put the child’s best interests first and cooperate with the other parent.
The Law Offices of Rod Firoozye is dedicated to serving parents in the Silicon Valley area. We provide knowledgeable legal support in family law cases that include child custody disputes and parenting time problems. Hire a child custody lawyer to work toward positive solutions for your child and your family’s long-term stability. Schedule a consultation today.
